The Power of Listening

April 2017

We are all subjected to, and subject ourselves to, speakers on a regular basis.  We turn on news to listen to anchors talk.  We attend church, locking ourselves into a position where we will listen to someone speak to us.  A student’s job is to listen to speakers! You may be in a job where seminars and webinars are common, so you are, again, are subjected to listening to speakers.

Too many speakers, in my experience, talk and talk, yet say very little.  I have heard multiple speakers stuff ten minutes’ worth of content into an entire hour.  It can be very hard to listen to such speakers, and might be one of the reason for declining attendance at certain events.

Speakers are often expected to be entertaining as well as informative.  I’m not sure when this changed in the Academic world, but it has.  I’ve been teaching at the College level since the 1980’s.  I recently read where College Professors are expected to entertain their students. Really?  What happened to teaching your students, and your students doing their part to learn?

After speaking to a group, I am often asked for ideas, advice, and counsel from members of the audience.  I also work as a Business Consultant, where it is my job to assess situations and offer ideas.  The first thing I do, when asked for counsel, is start asking questions.  I am not trying to learn what the person wants to hear, so I can regurgitate it back to them.  That’s not why I’m there.  I’m there to learn the situation, and the best way to do that is by listening.

Listening offers an abundance of benefits.  First, it gives the person speaking an opportunity to formalize their thoughts.  As they put their ideas or questions into words, they can explicitly specify what they want to learn or know.  Second, as the speaker is putting their thoughts into words, they may hone in on what they really want, even as they hear what they are saying.

More than once I have heard people, as they are sharing a challenge, realize the solution, just by speaking aloud.  As they express their concerns, they may be able to see others’ views, or open up ideas for solutions they didn’t see until they spoke the challenge.

Listening offers great benefits to the person or people hearing as well.  First, it gives them time to hear and filter what is being said. It allows them to understand, even clarify, the situation.  It allows them to show care and compassion to the speaker . . . just by listening.

It is when listening that we can learn.  There was once an intelligent and educated man who rarely had much to say.  His wife one day asked, with all his knowledge, why he didn’t speak more at dinner parties when he was the most versed in the room.  His response was that he already knew what he knew, but he didn’t know what others knew. By listening he could learn more.

Listening shows respect to others.  This is especially true if you are listening to hear and not listening to respond.  If you are formulating your next sentence, you are probably not listening really well.

Listening can be humbling.  After a certain age, we all have knowledge.  It may be from experience as well as books, but we all should know something with time.  In addition, some truths are ingrained in us from birth, such as right from wrong and truth from lies.  As we choose to listen to others’ thoughts and ideas, even though we have our own, we are showing humility.

Listening can be enlightening.  You may not learn any new information, but if you listen for nuances, you may learn how a person feels about a situation or topic.  It’s the idea of not only what is said, but how it is said.  When someone shares information with derision, for example, then you better know how to respond without alienating the person.  If someone finds a story horrific or funny, that may offer some insight into who they are, information that you may not have gleaned if you hadn’t listened first.

Another benefit of being a good listener is that others will want to be around you.  People dislike being around know-it-alls who have to constantly share their knowledge.  In truth, sometimes the people who say the least know the most.  Being a good listener will make others want to be around you, and you can hear what is said, so you can respond appropriately if asked.

Finally, good listening is mannerly.  We are taught to not interrupt, yet people do so all the time, sometimes even with an apology up front:  “I’m sorry to interrupt, but I have to tell you . . . “  Um, no.  Unless there is a fire, the polite behavior is to allow a person to finish. I understand that a person may be excited, even passionate, about a topic, but if you interrupt people too often, they will learn to not speak around you.  Then conversation dries up completely, and eventually so does the relationship.

I’m sure there is more to say to on this subject.  For now, please accept that there is great power in listening – you can learn, show empathy and compassion, and just be polite.

 

Blessings in Christ,

 

Lindy

Know Where You Belong

March 28, 2017

Remember when you were on the playground, or in gym class, and whether you were playing softball or kickball… were you the kid who wanted the ball hit to you, so that you could be active in the game and make the winning catch?  Or were you the kid who silently prayed that the ball went anywhere else?  If it did come your way, did you feel huge trepidation and fear? First that you would mess up and second that everyone would be angry with you? Even after the event there would be teasing that may last way too long . . .

In the classroom, were you the child who waved their hand frantically with grunts to get the teacher’s attention, hoping you could answer and show off your knowledge? Or were you the one who tried to sink into their seat, hopeful that you could disappear?

No matter which example you relate to best, it’s probably that that your feelings weren’t necessarily because you were incapable of catching the ball or answering the question. It was more a question of your comfort level.

Einstein once said  if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.

So, rather than going through life feeling like a fish trying to climb a tree, think about where you shine. When do others turn to you and say, “You should do this.”

I promise you, nobody has ever asked me to lead music. There’s an excellent reason for that . . . I have zero music ability. Don’t feel bad and tell me it’s not that bad. It is what it is and I’m okay with it . . . now.

I grew up in a family that was all about music and being in school musicals. I was always put in the chorus where my voice could be drowned out. It was a huge issue at the time but now I realize I wasn’t being true to my calling. I don’t know how, of six children, my parents had 5 with musical talent and one with none, but they did. I accept that. In fact, I can joke about it.  When asked if I have my siblings musical talent I reply, “No, I got the beauty in the family.”  It’s a joke!  My siblings are all wonderful and gorgeous.

However, now at meetings, I’m eager for people to look at me and say, what do you think we should do? I don’t always wait to be asked. But this is where I shine . . . I have leadership and teaching skills.

While some people try to shrink into their chairs in board rooms, I’m almost hopping out of mine. I’m never happier than when I’m facilitating the meeting. I know my place in this world . . . at the front of the room.

So where do you belong? On a ball field? On stage? In a lab? Behind a chess board? In front of students? Digging a ditch?

Recently I had a conversation with someone who was almost apologetic about his business, thinking it was too small for me to Consult. Not true. Delete the thought. There are no clients too small for me. I go where I’m called. Yes, it’s a joy to speak to hundreds, but I also enjoy speaking to one. Different but equal.

One thing I remember from my thespian days was the motto, there are no small parts, only small actors. Don’t be a small actor.  Just find where you’re called and watch yourself rise to the top.

Lindy is an In-house Consultant, Business Coach, Speaker, and Author.  She is The Adjunct Executive to companies and departments with 50 – 100 employees, focusing on Communication, Leadership, and Corporate Culture.  You can have Lindy in to motivate your Team with Seminars and Workshops, or be more successful when Lindy works with your staff one day a week, with her unique business model. Call 770-912-6192 today.

Get Definitions Straight

March 21, 2017

Like me, you may get frustrated when people, of every age and in every level within a company, misunderstand and misuse words.  Beyond the obvious errors, like using a non-existent word, such as irregardless (the word is regardless – it’s the only option), I mean intelligent people who just misunderstand basic business concepts. Sadly, their lack of understanding does not stop them from talking about the subject.

For instance, cost and price are not synonyms.  I assure you I have heard a person talk about the cost of their product when they mean the price of their product.  It is possible only the highest C-level employees know the real costs.  In addition, cost is actually a very difficult number to compute as it can change daily.

For instance, while direct costs are clear (raw materials and direct labor), the fixed and variable costs that have to be spread over everything may change regularly.  If you hire a new person, or the cost of utilities or raw materials increase or decrease, then the cost per item increases or decreases.  You need to understand calculus, and first derivatives, to have a good understanding of marginal costs – the cost of making one more unit.  But you just need common sense to understand that if cost is equal to price then there is no profit. The words cost and price should not be used interchangeably.

Also, the misunderstanding of the word Branding.  Oh my gosh!  About a decade ago the word Branding became a buzz word and just won’t go away.  Think of the origin – ranchers branded their cattle to let people know ownership.  Now a segment of the business world makes it into a huge deal, when often what they are discussing is Advertising!

Advertising and branding are not synonyms.  Brand and Logo may be synonymous depending on how they are used.  In cattle ranching they are synonyms.  The goal is to have that logo, thus brand, leave a positive impression on consumers.  That’s it.

Advertising is calling attention to one’s product or service, usually through a paid medium such as television or internet or magazines, for example, for the purpose of selling the product or service.  So when a company is trying to sell their product, they may be advertising, or promoting, or straight out selling.  Calling it branding is just a way to get you to buy another book.

And please note that Advertising is a small segment of Marketing, as is Sales.  Back in the 80’s, one day we woke up and all the Salesmen were suddenly Marketing Reps.  Now the buzz word is Business Development.  All these functions, along with Research, Logistics, and some other functions, all fit UNDER the term Marketing.  Just changing the title does not change the job, or the goal.

You want your sales to increase.  A company can achieve that in a myriad of ways – indirectly, through advertising Push Strategies; or perhaps through couponing, which is a Pull Strategy; or Sales, which is exactly what it says.  And a positive image, brand, is important for all of these, but does not replace any of them.

I’m sure every industry deals with the misuse of jargon, just like the English language as a whole deals with the misuse of grammar and syntax.  You will often find the wrong word used (your instead of you’re) and apostrophes used inappropriately.  I guess we just learn to deal with it, or try to educate everyone . . . one blog at a time.

Lindy is an In-house Consultant, Business Coach, Speaker, and Author.  She is The Adjunct Executive to companies and departments with 50 – 100 employees, focusing on Communication, Leadership, and Corporate Culture. You will be more successful when  Lindy shares a seminar at your next event, or works with your staff one day a week, with her unique business model. Call 770-912-6192 today.

 

 

The Dangers of Self-Marketing

March 14, 2017

Many entrepreneurs and business people take on the task of marketing their business when they are ill-prepared to do so.  We’ve all known people who suffer from demi-god complexes.  Because they are trained and good in one thing, maybe medicine, they believe they are good at everything.

This was the challenge with two engineers who decided to stop engineering and bought a printing business.  While they were both good engineers, neither was a good business man.  Worse, because they were good engineers and had a demi-god mentality, they wouldn’t seek or take advice on business.  It didn’t take long before they were running the company into the ground.  One of the gentlemen bailed and returned to the world of engineering that he knew well.  The other, however, chose to learn business and make the company work.  The last I learned, he was turning himself, and his business, around.

Another story I have is similar, in that a gentleman took over a successful non-profit enterprise.  The company was doing fine, with a positive balance sheet and seven employees.  Within a few years of the new president taking over, however, they were down to one and a half employees and were losing money annually.  What happened?

The new president came in with his own ideas, none of which were tested (or even valid).  He made his changes and things just didn’t work.  But that’s not the point of this story.  After seven years he caught on and hired a Director of Marketing.  This is where the real challenge lies.  First, the new director was asked to make phone calls and perform administrative functions.  That’s not the best use of a marketing director.  Second, when the director gave the president suggestions and ideas, they were told the president liked the way he was doing things.  So why had he hired the person?  He was being fed solid marketing advice but refused to listen.  Sigh.

Why do people choose to self market when they are unprepared?  I mean, we have laws against self-medicating and the adage is well known, The attorney who represents himself has a fool for a client.  But, in business, people with no knowledge, education, or background try to do it themselves.

I think the first reason is that they are trying to save money.  Sadly, this is often the exact opposite of what they need.  While they are trying to save money, in fact they waste money by creating and printing poor brochures that don’t market their company well at all; they create their own website that doesn’t perform the function a website should perform; they don’t spend money where they need to or spend it where they shouldn’t.

Second, a lot of people seem to think they know and understand marketing, ignoring the fact that there are master’s degrees in this subject.  A little knowledge can be a dangerous thing, which leads to the next reason people self market . . .

They don’t know what they don’t know.  If someone believes that you just create a website or brochure and people will flock to your door, they truly don’t know what they don’t know.  Good marketing includes understanding the controllable elements in a company, your target market, and your competition, just at the very beginning.

So, what are some common errors people make in self marketing?  I think the largest two are intertwined, selling too early and not establishing a relationship.  The first rule of sales is, resist the urge the sell!  Five little words that can change your life.  If you see every person at a network as a potential client and immediately begin selling to them, you’re in trouble.  Your reputation will get out and you’ll lose any possible sales you might have had if you had done the right thing and established a relationship first, learned about the person and their company, networked with and for them, discovered how your product or service could benefit them, then explained how you could work together.

The next two challenges are often hand in hand as well.  People don’t know or consider their target market or their competition.  When someone is truly in love with their product or service, they believe everyone in the world could benefit from it.  Further, they don’t see any other product or service as similar enough to work as a replacement, or substitute, therefore they think they have no competition.  Wrong on both counts!

There are segmentation variables to help you discover, learn, and narrow your target market.  The more select your market, the more directly you can approach them through direct selling and promotional marketing, so you end up with far more for your dollar.  The marketing adage is, 50% of every advertising dollar is wasted—but nobody knows which 50%.  The more you narrow and target your market, the more effective and efficient your marketing dollars will be.

This theory of not having competition is absolutely inane!  The people who believe they don’t have competition don’t understand competition.  Direct competition is an easy concept.  The two gas stations across the street from each other are directly competing for your business.  One may be in a better position in that they’re on the right side of the road for you to stop easily.  That’s an advantage.  The other may combat that with a lower price, making the crossing worth a driver’s time.

Indirect competition is harder to understand and accept.  Anyone or anything that keeps money going to your company is competition.  So in a bad economy, when prices rise but salaries don’t, having a larger share of income go toward necessities, simple food bills become competition for movies and other leisure activities.  In this sense, everybody has competition!

Next, there are only four things a company can control—what they sell, be it a product or service, including customer service; what price they charge (not costs; costs and prices are not synonymous in business); how and where they distribute their product; and how they promote, advertise, and sell their product.  That’s it.  It’s important, in addition to understanding these, to make sure they get along.  For instance, you can’t choose a prestige price if you choose to sell in a discount outlet.  That’s pretty basic, but the concept continues with all four of these variables.

Finally, the world is digital and no business person has a choice about this anymore.  It’s important to be actively engaged in social media on a daily basis.  Beyond LinkedIn, FaceBook, and Twitter, the very least every company needs is a website.  Before you create your website, know the purpose of the website.  Despite some people’s beliefs (refer to the first few paragraphs), a website does not exist to sell your service.  It’s fine if your service is available for sale on your website, but the point is to provide information and encourage people to contact you, so that you can build a relationship, while avoiding the urge to sell.  And we’ve come full circle.

Lindy is available, as a Speaker, Consultant, and Coach, to help you and your business.  Contact her today to learn more of what she knows:  770-912-6192

Create Your Reputation

March 7, 2017

If you were on trial, for what could you be found guilty? If someone were to search for evidence to convict you of something, what could be found? I’m trying to take a positive stance here so am not looking for corruption or lying or hatred.  I am asking, what qualities in your life could convict you?

I would like to be convicted for random acts of kindness.  I would like to be convicted for thoughtfulness; for compassion; for thinking of others before myself.  I am even willing to be found guilty for bad decisions if they were to help others.  We have all been in situations where we lost, but another person won by our decisions (think of your children if you’re questioning this).

If you chose ten people to share ten characteristics about you, what characteristics would appear on every single list? Would it be stinginess? Or hatred? Moodiness? Greed?

In this world, you can decide the reputation you want to have, and work toward making that reputation yours.  How?  First, through your thoughts.  When you think, think good things.  Then you will speak good things.  So positive thoughts will lead to encouraging words.  Have a positive attitude that shows.

The other day I met a gent at a network and, just to be helpful, offered him some Marketing ideas for his small company.  Please note, I get paid for this work, but was trying to help this guy who had told me he’s not doing well.  He shot down every one of my ideas.  Either the target was too small so not worth his time, or too difficult to approach, or he had already seen people in the targeted area.  I finally looked at him and said, “You are an ‘I can’t’ guy, aren’t you?”

Now, I have an I can’t statement:  I can’t work with people who have no interest in their own success.  Even though he was at a business network, which suggests some sort of motivation (unless he was there to drink and hit on women, which I’ve seen), he had every reason ready for why he shouldn’t try and couldn’t try despite admitting to me that nothing he has done to date is working.  Oh well.

After thoughts and words, make sure you take action to create the reputation that you want.  It’s good to think about what to do, and share your ideas and speak positively, but it’s truly with your actions that you will choose, then create, your reputation.  You need to have the actions – don’t just say you’re a hard worker, get to work early daily, work through lunch, and stay late.  Don’t just say you’re an initiator, create some ideas and present them.  Don’t tell us you’re willing to do anything to get ahead, volunteer for whatever tasks come along.  Be the person you would want working for you.

And there it is – thoughts, words, and actions create your new reputation.

Call Lindy today for a free Consultation on what she can accomplish in your firm. Whether you need her just once, or on a recurring basis, you will be more successful when Lindy works with you and your staff. Call 770-912-6192 or email LMEarl@EarlMarketing.com today!

Lindy is an In-house Consultant, Business Coach, Speaker, and Author.  She is The Adjunct Executive to companies and departments with 50 – 100 employees, focusing on Communication, Leadership, and Corporate Culture.